Real Life: How do you feel about getting older?

birthday cake

Today is my birthday. And this year marks my ‘scary age’ year. You know what year I mean. The year that when you were an 11 year old girl, you thought to yourself, “When I’m THIS age…wow, that’ll mean I’m old.” I remember thinking that at my age, I’d be married, living in a big city, and working some fancy corporate job with a corner office. I guess I got one (and a half?) out of three!

Now that I’m here, I kind of have to laugh at the naiveté of my pre-teen self. And also, how omniscient I was. At that age, I was so optimistic that by August 1, 2012, I’d feel like my life was completely on track. I thought that I’d have it all, and while to be honest, after last week’s discussion, I don’t know what that even means, I do think the life I envisioned for myself back then isn’t too far off from the life I’m living now. Maybe because over all, things are pretty happy?

Overall, I don’t really mind getting older. Signs of aging haven’t set in yet (though I do notice my skin is far more tempermental than it used to be, even from just a few years ago. Oh, and I can’t eat pasta like I used to, either!), though talk to me in another ten years and we’ll see how that’s going. I know that as women, there can sometimes be so much negativity around growing older, and I’ve always wondered why that is. Why all the dread? I’m just excited to have made it another year. And to maybe also get a nice dinner out of it. :)

How do you feel about getting older? What is (or was) your ‘scary age’? And if you’ve already reached it, did you find, like me, that it wasn’t scary at all? That in fact, it was kind of awesome?

{Image Credit: The Sweetest Occasion



  1. 8.1.12

    Well first, happy birthday!! I am in a really great place, but not where I thought I would be or “planned” to be 10 years ago.But I have embraced the fact that I may not be where I planned to be, but I am right where I should be. That makes everything and any age ok with me. I hope you have a wonderful birthday!

  2. 8.1.12

    The weirdest part for me is that my parents had 2 kids by the time they were by age. I think times have changed… and in the scheme of things, I think its for the better.

  3. 8.1.12
    ashley said:

    i love getting older! i am secretly counting down the days until my 30th birthday because I believe my 30’s will be the best years of my life!! xxoo.
    ashley {a {little} dash of ash}

  4. 8.1.12
    Courtney said:

    I’m going to be weird and admit getting older is no big thing to me, I think it’s kind of exciting:) Have a fabulous birthday!

  5. 8.1.12
    Morgan said:

    Happy Birthday Victoria!! xo Glam

  6. 8.1.12
    rita said:

    happy, happy day! i hope you spend it relaxing and doing what you love! i’m really excited to turn 30. my dude is 5 years older than me and he says that every year has just been better since he turned 30. he is happier, more settled, more confident, more successful… it’s been a good 3 years for him! wishing you all the best today and in the year to come!

  7. 8.1.12

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  8. 8.1.12

    First HAPPY BIRTHDAY. Wishing you not only a day filled with good things, happiness and laugher but the entire year.
    My scary age was 40….and it did not disappoint:) LOL….suddenly felt a few aches and pains I had never had, noticed a tiny line or wrinkle here and there that suddenly seemed to appear…but truth be told its also brought some great things to my life, like wisdom, experience, confidence and getting a sense of myself and purpose. Though it is still a “work in progress”. My new scary age is 60…yowza! Lets hope by then in 13 years…the never going to age pill has been FDA Happy bday!

  9. 8.1.12
    Wave said:

    Happy Birthday!! Today is my Birthday also (twinsies)
    Hope you have a wonderful day :) I’m still pretty young, but it’s still daunting at times thinking ohh another year has gone by, but then I just think of all the amazing things & people I’ve spent the past year with <3

  10. 8.1.12
    Susan said:

    Happy Birthday Victoria! I hope that this year is everything you want it to be and more!

  11. 8.1.12

    Happy Birthday! My scary age was 30, but this year I am turning 40 and I can’t believe how fast the 10 years have gone by. This decade has brought me confidence, wisdom, and peace in living life not exactly as planned. I’m sure you will find, as I did, that growing older is a good thing. Minus a few wrinkles.

  12. 8.1.12

    What a great post! Almost exactly the post I wrote on Monday about turning 29, in fact. I feel the same way. Like, it should feel big because society / my 12-year-old self tells me it should, but it doesn’t at all. And I think that’s kind of awesome and exactly the way it should be!

  13. 8.1.12

    Happy birthday gorgeous!! I agree, I think we should all try to embrace getting older and reverse the stereotype… As for you, I’d say your life is on a pretty great track right now… All the success and happiness in the world! Xx

  14. 8.1.12

    Happy Birthday!

    You’re doing great! I share your opinion with aging. I’m not upset at all. I think as a teenager I always saw my ‘peak’ as my 40s (I idolized martha stewart). So for me I just see aging as a maturation and a increase in experience for a richer life. I’m excited about it!!

  15. 8.1.12

    Happy happy birthday love! I’m with you on the pasta thing, but make sure to spoil yourself today! You deserve it!!!

  16. 8.1.12
    Jen said:

    I just turned 31 yesterday and in the days leading up to it, have been feeling very anxious about the fact that the last year has gone by extremely fast, I don’t feel like I’m where I want to be in terms of my career and like I should be doing more. Then I reminded myself that hey, I’m only 31, it’s not like I’m 90 and not everything happens overnight so I’m trying to relax and enjoy.

    Happy Birthday!

  17. 8.1.12

    aww – happiest of birthdays to you! i once worried about it, and every once in a while, ill get flooded with a sense of urgency about aging, but i think i need to focus on doing it gracefully and ill be ok. good luck to you and all the best in the year(s) ahead

  18. 8.1.12

    Happy birthday !! What a lovely way to start the month off! I think my scary age is whenever I get pregnant (hoping later rather than sooner). And if not then, 40. I think aging has only made me better (well, better than my teen self, I was pretty cool as a little kid), and it’ll be fun to see gradual changes (I think that now, buuut)…haha anyway, enough with the heavy! Enjoy your beautiful day!

  19. 8.1.12
    Ashley said:

    I turn 26 at the end of the month and I’m really dreading it.

    I currently work in a going no where job, but I do like my job, which is good. I started a blog in January and it’s not as good as I would like it to be.

    I still live with my parents and have 5 digit debt from college, that I’m going to be paying off for what seems like forever.

    I currently am going through an ongoing health issue, so this is most definitely not my best year.

    I’m waiting, waiting, waiting to get engaged, so it just seems like everything is in limbo and it’s super super frustrating.

    I’m glad your “scary age” is going good!

    Happy Birthday!

    (Sorry to be such a downer)


  20. 8.1.12
    Emily said:

    Happy Birthday! Hope you have a wonderful day filled with your favorite things.

    I’m turning 25 this year, but my new husband just turned 30 in January… he was okay with it. For some reason turning 27 was horrible for him – he was in such a bad mood for months! I have to admit, I’m not looking forward to getting older (honestly, I think 25 is going to be my last birthday!) To each her own. Maybe I’ll embrace it at 30 and just take 4 years off!

  21. 8.1.12
    Meaghan said:

    Oh man, your post is just perfect today because I am freaking out about just this! My 24th birthday is approaching and it is STRESSING ME OUT. I just feel like I don’t have anything figured out, I don’t know what I want to “be” when I grow up (woops too late!), et cetera et cetera… but like you point out, I’ve got my health, a job, family near by, great friends, and I’m happy. You gotta focus on the positives and not let the little things worry you!

  22. 8.1.12
    Meaghan said:

    Also, this is so me…

    Sally: He just met her… She’s supposed to be his transitional person, she’s not supposed to be the ONE. All this time I thought he didn’t want to get married. But, the truth is, he didn’t want to marry me. He didn’t love me.
    Harry: If you could take him back now, would you?
    Sally: No. But why didn’t he want to marry me? What’s the matter with me?
    Harry: Nothing.
    Sally: I’m difficult.
    Harry: You’re challenging.
    Sally: I’m too structured, I’m completely closed off.
    Harry: But in a good way.
    Sally: No, no, no, I drove him away. AND, I’m gonna be forty.
    Harry: When?
    Sally: Someday.
    Harry: In eight years.
    Sally: But it’s there. It’s just sitting there, like some big dead end…

  23. 8.1.12

    Happy Birthday! I also turn one of “those” ages this week. It’s not scary but I certainly thought at age 29 I would be married with kids. I grew up in the South, so I thought I would have all that by 25.

    But I have to say, I wouldn’t swap where I am now with where I thought I would be. Because where I am now is SO much better than I could have ever imagined.

    With your attitude, you’ll keep on “aging” gracefully. Happy girls are pretty girls. Hope your birthday’s amazing!

  24. 8.1.12

    Happy birthday girl!! And I gotta say…30’s are the BEST! I am in better shape now than when I was in my 20’s, have more confidence in who I am and what I want, and feel as though I have direction. You are getting married soon (Eeek!) and have so much greatness ahead of you. I can’t wait to see what comes down the road for you this year!

    Now go celebrate with some mexican food :)
    XO – Marion

  25. 8.1.12
    julia said:

    happy birthday!

    i have to admit, getting older is not something i worry or think too much about :)


  26. 8.1.12

    Happy, happy birthday! I don’t think too much about age, though I am getting to the point that I feel like I should be younger than I actually am. In some ways, I have far exceeded my own expectations for life, but in others, I’m way behind. I figure everything happens for a reason though, try not to dwell on it too much, and just enjoy the present moment instead.

  27. 8.1.12

    Happy birthday my dear! I never thought much about age, until I was turning 30 earlier this year. At times, I get down about getting older, but I don’t think I look my age just yet… (nor do I act it… ha!) While I certainly don’t have it all, I do feel like I’m in a better place than I was in my twenties. More self-assured, in a career I actually like, setting plans in place to follow my bigger dreams, and with a guy that I truly love. Life is not perfect, but it’s definitely good.

  28. 8.1.12

    Aww, Happy Birthday love!! Only better with age. XO

  29. 8.1.12
    Jeanne said:

    Happy birthday, Victoria! I felt the best when I turned 30, that liberating feeling! I still love being in my 30s…. but yes the sign of aging doesn’t quite hit until you get closer to mid-30s (esp after you have children)… so do whatever you need to do to take care of it now! :) Hope you’re enjoying your special day!

  30. 8.1.12

    Happy Bday Victoria…..I hope you had a wonderful day!!!


  31. 8.2.12
    Amanda said:

    Happy belated birthday!

    I dreaded 30 for the longest time not because of wrinkles or metabolism but because I always thought I’d get married in my early 20s and have a few kids before 30. And when 30 came and still no babies, I wondered what went wrong, and then I realized nothing went wrong because my 20s were a BLAST! Now that I am over it (and pregnant), I am OK with 31. It’s silly, I know, but that “ticking biological clock” was my whole thing. I’m sure the rest of my 30s will be great but I am kinda looking forward to 40! Some women in my life have grown more beautiful each year of their 40s. I love it!

  32. 8.2.12

    It’s funny…I don’t actually mind getting older. But because of society, I feel like I should. It’s the same way I feel about being single. I’m fine with it now, as my work takes up almost all of my time….but society makes me feel like I should be in that life race.

    I turn 27 this weekend and I feel you on thinking you should be at a certain place at a certain time. When I was younger, I thought if I wasn’t married by 24 the world would be over. My how things change.

    TheStylist LA

  33. 8.2.12
    Janel said:

    Happy birthday! I know I risk being scoffed at here, but I turned 20 one month ago and I was terrified to do so. I am still very, very scared about being in my twenties. I think it’s because I know there are so many things that I want to accomplish in the next ten year, and I am afraid I won’t be able to do them all, and I might miss my chance. This fear is probably irrational, but 20 was the most frightening birthday for me so far. I wonder how I will reflect on that fear and the next ten years when I turn 30. Kudos to you for posing this question.

  34. 8.2.12
    Jess said:

    I’ve been thinking about this since the 1st, since this month is my birthday too and I’m turning 28, which SOUNDS old to me! I guess when I was younger I thought I’d be married by now, but I am currently still single. I think that’s the biggest discrepancy between what I had imagined my 28-year old self to be like and where I actually am in life!

    Either way, happy birthday!! :)

  35. 8.2.12
    Nnenna said:

    Happy Birthday Victoria! I haven’t reached my scary age yet, but I am starting to feel a bit like I’m not so young anymore!

  36. 8.2.12
    Theresa said:

    Happy belated birthday! Ah, aging…I’m currently my scary age and there are times when I think I should have accomplished more by now, but I try not to linger in that space too long – It’s a kill joy, for sure. Regret has really been the only downside of my “scary” age. As long as I stay fit, eat right, and remain grateful, my age is pretty awesome.
    Enjoy another year wiser…You’ve accomplished so much!

  37. 8.2.12
    Erin said:

    When I turned 25 this past year I may have had a bit of a meltdown. Luckily, I was in Napa celebrating with girlfriends so it was easy to get over it. I still have moments of “holy cow I’m 25, I should be doing this this and this” and it’s not always easy to come to grips with the fact that it’s ok that I haven’t accomplished everything I thought I would and that I’m right where I’m supposed to be right now.

    So glad you posted this, I’ve chatted with my girlfriends about this topic numerous times before, but it’s nice to know it’s not just us!

  38. 8.3.12
    Sonya said:

    Happy belated birthday!!!! I am somewhat of a new readers. I turned 31 at the end of June. I don’t necessarily feel bad about getting older (or fear it) because I am aging gracefully, easy to do and say when I’m 31. But, I feel like there are certain areas of my life where I am “behind” and I don’t like that.

  39. 8.3.12

    i can’t believe it – one of my fave bloggers has the same bday as i do! not sure that we’re the same age (i turned 31), but getting older is a little scary, especially, as you touched on, if you don’t have everything in the place you think you should.

    i wrote a “31 things i’ve learned in my 31 years” post reflecting on why it’s awesome to be older and wiser. and a little wrinklier! haha. x

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